The Great Escape
by Nadine Santiago
Summary: The boys finally get time off and James can't escape the longing to spend his time with Camille. Meanwhile, feelings of homesickness and the prospect of a new relationship make Carlos second guess his decision to leave home.
1. Goodbyes

"James. James!" Kelly Wainwright screamed from outside of the recording booth. James Diamond looked around to see confusion in the eyes of Carlos Garcia, Logan Mitchell, and Kendall Knight, who with him formed the band Big Time Rush. Not only was there confusion, but looks of annoyance from Gustavo, the band's music producer and Kelly, Gustavo's assistant.

"Dude, you zoned out again." Carlos whispered to James as everyone went back to their microphones. "Gustavo wants us to try the last part of Invisible again."  
>James looked at the clock. 3:15. Where had the time gone? He felt as if he he'd been zoned out for weeks. James yawned and looked around the booth to his band mates. They all looked as exhausted as he felt. It had been 4 weeks since the boys started writing and recording for the new album. This meant 4 weeks stuck at Roc Records with not so much as a 30 minute break, and 4 weeks of none stop Big Time Rush; all day, every day. James loved being in the studio and loved the time spent with the three other guys beside him, but after 4 weeks of being around each other, James was starting to feel on edge and being on edge made his mind wander.<p>

Time seemed to be moving at an unusual pace these days. To James, Big Time Rush had become number one pop sensations overnight. James wasn't upset about this by any means. He had always dreamed of this life; recording albums, performing to sold out crowds, screaming fans worshiping his every move. Since he was young James always knew he wanted to be famous. He never believed his dream would come true this fast. It seemed like yesterday he was singing songs to himself while he and the boys were skating around the hockey rink in Minnesota. The next thing they knew, they were moving to Hollywood to try and make it as a singing group. In an instant two years had gone by with a platinum selling record and 2 tours under their belts. It was hard to believe they were on the verge of completing the 2nd record with another tour not far behind. It was even harder to believe that almost all of James' wildest dreams had come true. Almost all of his dreams.

As the music faded, the boys waited in anticipation as Gustavo and Kelly discussed their last performance. As soon as they saw the huge grin shining from Kelly's face, they knew they had done their job. Before Gustavo and Kelly could "Have a nice break," all four boys ran out of the booth and were gone.

"I thought we'd NEVER leave the studio!" Kendall announced as the boys got on the shuttle back to their apartment. "I'm going to be singing these songs in my sleep!"  
>"You better get used to it; Gustavo has already started booking venues for the next tour." Logan said, matter-of-factly. "You're going to be singing it every night for the next few months."<p>

The boys sat in silence as Logan's comment sunk in.

"Look on the bright side, guys;" Carlos started, "we have the next four weeks off to do whatever we want. No Gustavo, No Kelly, no worries. Just home town fun, home town cooking…"

"and home town girls!" said Kendall, continuing Carlos' exact thought.

While the other boys seemed happy at the thought of getting away from the LA scene, James felt knot in his throat. He swallowed hard and plastered a smile on his face to match the others. The boys had decided to spend their time off back home in Minnesota with family and friends. James should have been more than eager to get home but something was seriously holding him back.

The thoughts escaped his mind as the shuttle approached the Palm Woods. After 4 weeks of early morning recording calls, and late night rehearsals, the boys hardly recognized their LA home during the light of day. It was already mid-July and most of the kids at the Palm Woods were already on their own vacations. As the boys walked into the lobby, they saw a few familiar faces still hanging around. One of which being the eager smile of Camille Roberts. Camille had been at the Palm Woods pursuing her acting career as long as Big Time Rush had been for their music. Not only did she become one of the boys' best friends here, but she remained, to this day, as Logan's "on again, off again" girlfriend. As Camille approached them, James felt his cheeks get hot realizing he couldn't take his eyes off of her. It wasn't until she leaned in to kiss Logan that James was brought back to reality; they were definitely back on.

The "off again" part of Logan and Camille's relationship was partly due to James' own relationship with Camille. Although they weren't great friends at the beginning, James often stepped in when Camille needed an acting partner and their mutual love of acting kept them close. That was until a kiss in a script turned into a kiss that seemed to James forever. They both vowed to themselves and Logan that the kiss was just acting and nothing more. After that day, Camille and Logan were sorting their relationship and James felt it necessary to keep his distance from her as much as possible.

"I cannot believe you boys are leaving me here alone in LA." Camille said as she put her arms around the boys. One arm went around Logan and the other arm went around James as they walked up to the boys' room. James felt chills run down entire body at her touch and he hoped nobody would notice as the blood rushed to his cheeks. If he could have run away right then and there without looking slightly insane, he would have. Instead he allowed himself the few minutes of bliss that came from having Camille's arm around him.

"Two weeks Camille free," James thought to himself, "two weeks without Camille and Logan holding hands, Camille and Logan staring into each other eyes, and making out every other minute." This really should have made James feel better, but instead the knot returned. It was two weeks without Camille. Period. Two weeks without her laugh, her smile, and the way she got excited when a new script came in. He'd even miss the pout her lips made when he'd make up an excuse not to rehearse with her. He almost wished he could find an excuse right now to stay at the Palm Woods so he could be with her. James bit his lower lip and shook the visions in his head away.

* * *

><p>"So I guess this is it! You guys are off." Camille looked around to all the boys. Kendall and Carlos hugged Camille goodbye and started to walk into the terminal. Logan lingered to give Camille a proper goodbye, while James stayed pretending to look at his phone one last time. He bit back the rage that was building up inside of him as he stood by trying not to watch. Logan, to dazed by his kiss with Camille, wandered off down the terminal, not noticing James still standing there. Pretty soon it was just James and Camille standing there alone looking at each other. It seemed like minutes passed where they stood just staring at each other. James lips moved to form the words he knew he wouldn't be able to say.<p>

"I'm going to miss you." Camille said biting her lower lip.

"Yeah, well I'm sure life is going to be pretty dull without Big Time Rush running around destroying the place." James replied nervously. He couldn't let his mind explore the thought that she meant him. Just him.

"James, you know what I mean. This place won't be the same without you here. _I_ won't be the same without you here. It's all I've been thinking about since I found out you were leaving me." Camille brushed a piece of James hair out of his eyes.

Him leaving her? James searched her eyes looking to see if there was humor behind them. Her eyes were locked with his, more serious than he'd ever seen them. Camille was a good actress, but this all seemed more intense than any role she had ever played. He quickly looked away for fear that if he kept his eyes on her he would say something he wouldn't be able to take back. Camille put both of her hands on either side of his face. His skin burned where she laid her hands.

"Look at me," She focused his head back to her, "I know we're in a bit of a tough situation right now, but you have to know that I haven't stopped thinking about you since…" she trailed off. "I know you haven't either."

James studied her, confused. "But what about Logan? What about your BOYFRIEND? If you really felt something for me then why are you with him? Why did you get back together? How come you didn't just… " the questions came pouring out of James' mouth. It was as if that knot had disappeared and every question and every feeling James had toward Camille started to spill out. "…break it off? How come you said it meant nothing. You knew it meant something, it meant EVERY—" James' words were interrupted as Camille's lips crushed themselves against his. He wanted to pull away. He wanted to run away like a scared little boy, but every single cell in his body kept him standing in place. As much as his brain told him no, his arms wrapped themselves around her and pulled her in even closer. Their kiss was growing more and more urgent as the last call for his flight came over the loudspeaker. James closed his eyes and took everything in and committed it to memory. Who knew the next time he would feel Camille's warm body and quickening heartbeat so close to his. He might never again get a chance to be this close to her, to smell her perfume, and taste her lips again. It had been months since their first kiss but without hesitation, their lips moved together again, as one. Camille's hands traveled from his face to around his neck and then furiously through his hair. His hands seemed to act on their own exploring her long curly hair, down her back and finally wresting around her waist. It was as if they'd been doing this all their lives. Her kiss felt so familiar to him, yet, the feeling of knowing that this kiss had meant as much to her as it did to him made James feel like kissing her was brand new territory he had never discovered. James hands went idly back up Camille's back pulling her even closer still. He didn't want to let her go, but suddenly, he felt a force pulling him away from her. He opened his eyes as Camille's face drifted farther and farther away from him.

"Dude, are you KIDDING me?" Logan had grabbed James by the shoulder and stood before him with a face of disbelief. Suddenly everything went blurry. James felt the heat rise into his face.

"James, you're clearly more tired than I thought, man." James opened his eyes to see Logan shaking him awake, "That wasn't even an hour drive and you're out like a light. Wake up! We're here."

Visions of Camille slowly faded away as the van came to stop in front of James' house. James looked around and he tried to fathom how he'd gotten there. It was just a second ago he was in the airport kissing Camille. There, James was fully willing ruin his best friend's relationship and now he was in a van thousands of miles away. As horrified as he was to see Logan appear, James almost wished the dream was real. At least then he and Camille could be out the open, disregarding the effect it would have on his friendship with Logan. Instead, nothing had changed, and he was still without Camille and this made the knot in James throat even tighter than ever.

"Was it a good dream at least, buddy?" Carlos said opening up the door to the van and hopping out.

"Yeah, it was… fine." James sighed as he got out of the van after him.


	2. Carlos comes home

"Mom, Dad, I'm home!" Carlos ran through the front door of his parent's house. The smell of fresh baked cookies filled room and Carlos knew instantly where his mother was. He dropped his bags at the door and ran for the kitchen to find Mrs. Garcia surrounded by a mess of bowls, batters and dozens of cookies.

"Carlos, my baby! Come give momma hug!" Mrs. Garcia cried as she wiped her hands on her apron and ran to her son.

"What is all this?" Carlos said squeezing his mother tight.

"Your father wanted me to bake, to BAKE for the police luncheon. Can you believe that? Do I look like Susie Homemaker to you?" Mrs. Garcia laughed to herself as she washed her hands.

"I'm surprised she actually went through with it." Carlos looked up to see Mr. Garcia coming through the hallway. "How's it going son?" He said walking up to greet Carlos.

"I'm good, dad. Happy to be home, that's for sure." Carlos replied giving his dad a pat on the back.

Carlos was probably the most eager of all the guys to get home to Shakopee. He hated to admit how homesick he had been the past couple of weeks and was more than ready to leave the craziness of LA behind for a few weeks with his family.

"Well we're very happy to have you home Carlos. We miss you around here. Your dad hasn't had to repair a single thing on the house since you left." His mother said holding his head in her hands. She gave him a kiss on each cheek and went back to her baking.

Carlos grabbed and handful of cookies walked up to his room to set his bags down. He looked around to see that everything was exactly how he had left it. His mother had been kind enough to make his bed and put some old clothes away but it seemed as if nothing else had been touched. His posters were still on their walls, his hockey sticks still hung up over his bed. It even smelled exactly the same as it was before he left. Carlos lied down and closed his eyes. Home. It was as if he never left. Even though his bed at The Palm Woods was more than adequate, Carlos knew that there was just something about his bed here that was perfect. Surprisingly it still formed to his body the same way it used to. Before he knew it he had drifted off to sleep.

"Please don't tell me you're going to spend the next four weeks hiding out in your bed Carlos."

Carlos felt groggy as he sat up to see his sister, Vanessa, sitting in a chair across from him. She was holding the most recent copy of Pop Tiger magazine. Big Time Rush had made the cover again and under their picture read the caption "Quiz: Which Rush Girl Are You?"

"Hey Ness!" Carlos said sleepily. "When did you get home?"

"About 2 hours ago. You were dead asleep so I didn't want to wake you up. Mom said dinner's ready. I figured you weren't going to want to miss that."

"Thanks for looking out, sis."

"No problem, and in case you're wondering, according to this, I'm Kendall girl, but you were a close second." Vanessa said peeking at him from over the magazine.

Next to Kendall, James, and Logan, Vanessa was Carlos's best friend. They were a little less than year apart in age and most of the time people assumed they were twins. Vanessa had the same big brown eyes and goofy smile as Carlos, and if she pulled back her long curly hair and put on a helmet and a hockey jersey, she could have easily been mistaken for her brother. Carlos always joked that he would fly Vanessa out to LA and hire her as a decoy for after concerts.

"So what's new Vanessa? How's college life treating you? Partying way too hard, I'm sure."

"You should talk Carlos. At least I'm not all over Pop Tiger magazine topless. Tisk. Tisk." She threw the magazine at Carlos. "But, if you must know, college is great. You should try it sometime."

Vanessa still gave Carlos a hard time about leaving. When Carlos had explained to his family that he was going to move to Los Angeles with his 3 best friends to become pop stars, like any rational family, they had their concerns. Their number one concern being that Carlos would be giving up a college education for the unknown. Carlos remembered the look on his mother's face the first time she met Gustavo. If looks could kill, Gustavo would have been D.O.A.

Luckily, Kelly was there to convince them that he would be in great hands. Not to mention the fact that Kendall's mom and sister would be there along the way to watch over him. Still, it was hard for Mr. and Mrs. Garcia to let their son go off into the world without their protection. It was especially hard on Vanessa who always imagined her and Carlos going away to college together.

Sometimes during long weeks of touring, Carlos would imagine what it could have been like if he had gone to college instead of Los Angeles. Seeing pictures of his sister with college friends at parties and hanging out in the dorms made Carlos feel like maybe he had made the wrong choice. But the minute he hit the stage and started performing with the group, he forgot all about what could have been. He loved to sing and he loved the life he chose.

"While you're home, you should come by the house and visit. The girls and I are throwing a party next weekend. You should come." Carlos made a hesitant face at his sister's request.

"I promise the girls will behave themselves. You can even bring the other guys." Vanessa continued, getting up to leave.

"Sure." Carlos said as he followed his sister downstairs to dinner.


	3. The Mention of Camille

"So how much do you miss me James?"

"Why do you think I would miss you?"

"You can't seriously tell me that after 2 weeks away you don't even miss me a little bit."

"Kelly, seriously, you and I both know that Big Time Rush and Rocque Records needed a serious break from each other."

"Jaaaaames…"

"Okay fine, I guess I miss you guys."

"Thank you, now, was that so bad?"

"YES! You're like a crazy mom."

"Good, now put your brothers on the phone."

James handed the phone to Logan and walked out onto the deck. Outside he found Kendall and Carlos eating lunch and basking in the warm summer day. He grabbed a drink, sat down and let the sun hit him. Two weeks had passed on their Minnesota vacation and the boys were already getting used to the slow life.

They had spent the majority of their first week home in Shakopee, Minnesota with family. For James, being home meant trading catered dinners for dish duty, 3-piece suits for t-shirts and jeans, and walking red carpets for walking Mitsy, his mother's Pomeranian. There was nothing like being home with the people who knew you best to make you feel like less of a super star. However, being at home was easier than James had imagined it would be. He was enjoying the time spent drinking tea with his mom, discussing her newest business endeavors, and sitting on the couch at his dad's house watching Comedy Central.

When James wasn't with family, he spent most of his time, like today, hanging with the guys at Logan's house. Logan had one of the nicest houses in town, most likely due to the fact that his mother was one of the top real estate agents in Shakopee. The boys were also making the rounds to see old friends in town. Since the boys left Minnesota, most of their friends had graduated and moved away. However, a few of their friends had come back to Shakopee and started to build their own lives here.

James remembered the first party the four of them went to when they got home. The first weekend back, Tom Gregory, an old hockey teammate, had everyone over for a barbeque. The boys, fearing their fans and friends would be crazed knowing that Big Time Rush would be at a backyard party, arrived after dark and snuck in through Tom's basement door. James lowered his hat, and prepped himself for an ambush as they entered the backyard. Closing his eyes and bracing himself for the screams, James was surprised when the only scream he heard was from Tom asking him to roll a cooler down on his way over. Laughing at how ridiculous he must have looked trying to sneak into a party, James took a breath, grabbed a drink, and made at home.

"Man, Gustavo must be driving Kelly crazy. That's the 4th times she's called since we left! If we're not careful, she'll be knocking on my door with a suitcase." Logan said as he walked on to the deck. He was attempting to balance the phone, a cookie jar, a bowl of chips, and a bottle of soda. The boys attacked the food before he could even set it down.

"Yeah, well she told me we better be working on our cardio. Gustavo doesn't want us coming back flabby." Carlos said in between mouthfuls of chips. The boys stopped chewing and looked around at the table full of food and burst into laughter.

"What Gustavo and Kelly don't know won't hurt them." Carlos whispered as he snuck his hand back into the cookie jar. He hesitated a second and then added, "But we should probably play a little one on one tomorrow morning, Logan; just to be safe."

Unfortunately, without Gustavo and Kelly around to watch everything they put in their mouths, weekend parties and home cooked meals had the boys eating more than usual. Carlos and Logan, unlike James, were trying to keep up with their cardio for fear that Gustavo would put them through boot camp if they got lazy during their time off. Meanwhile, Kendall, who had already finished his sandwich and was onto another, could eat whatever he wanted and not gain a pound. James hadn't worked out once since being home. This was something quite rare for him. He had always made an extra effort to maintain his appearance. After all, you never knew when the paparazzi would appear. James never dared leave The Palm Woods without looking camera ready. Now that he was home, James didn't worry about paparazzi. If Tom's party was any indication of how the people of Shakopee felt about him, he wouldn't have to worry about bad shots ending up in Tiger Pop magazine. It wasn't like he was trying to impress anyone.

"Speaking of one on one, Logan, how's Camille? Kendall asked giving Logan a sly grin. James choked at the sound of Camille's name. The boys stopped and looked at him.

"Chip went down the wrong pipe." James coughed as he hit his fist to his chest. The thought of having to listen to Logan talk about Camille made him wish he had something sharp in hands.

"Uh yeah, she's alright. I guess." Logan said, shrugging off the question. James closed his eyes and hoped that would be the end of the conversation. "Haven't gotten to talk to her much to be honest, I don't really know what she's up to."

What was Camille up to, James wondered. He had been able to go a whole two weeks without thinking about it. He glared at Kendall and secretly cursed him for even mentioning her name. Now all he could hear was her name over and over again. His phone felt heavy in his pocket. He wanted to call her. He wanted to tell her he missed her. What was worse was that he wanted to tell her that the one person, who should miss her the most, didn't really seem to.


	4. Vanessa's Party

"Thanks for coming with me, James." Carlos said as they walked to the door of his sister's house. Carlos had been slightly disappointed when he had only gotten one taker for his sister's house party. Kendall was visiting his grandma in Minneapolis and Logan had a video date with Camille. Luckily, James was more than eager to go out.

"It's no problem. It'll be nice to get out and meet somebody else... new… somebody new… new people." James said stumbling on his words. Carlos stopped and looked at his friend. James laughed nervously. "You know, give 'em the old James Diamond charm. All the ladies love it."

Even though the words sounded like James, Carlos could sense something else behind it. He had been watching James lately and knew there was something going on with him. He didn't want to pry in but he had definitely seen certain sadness in him lately.

"You alright dude? You seem… off." Carlos said analyzing his friend.

"Yeah… no…it's nothing." James said with the same plastered smile as before. He knocked on the door.

"Hey, listen, you know you can talk to me, right?" Carlos asked even more concerned now.

James sighed and looked Carlos right in the eyes. "It's just –"

"Carlos! James! You guys came!" Vanessa opened the door and greeted boys with huge hugs. She took their coats and set them in the closet.

"Well, make yourselves at home; there are drinks in the fridge, snacks on the table and lots of pretty girls!" Vanessa said nudging James in the side. James laughed it off. "But, before you go any further, you need to try these." She handed the boys two small glasses filled with a neon blue liquid. "Shots. I made it myself in honor of my brother finally coming to visit. It's called the Big Time Rush! DRINK!"

The boys looked at one another nervously. James took the glass and lifted towards Carlos. "When at home?"

"When at home! Cheers!" Carlos replied and he, James and Vanessa clinked glasses and drank.

Carlos had to admit, his sister did know how to throw a party. She could manage a career in party planning if she really wanted to. As he and James made their way through the crowd they saw faces full of people they didn't know, and to their surprise, people that didn't know them either. It made him feel good to just blend in with the crowd. Vanessa had been absolutely right about this party, because as they walked down the hallway there were plenty of pretty girls. It seemed to perk him up. Carlos looked over at James who still seemed to be donning a plastered smile. "You want another drink?" Carlos said hoping it might take the edge off a James. James nodded and they started to walk.

When they reached the kitchen, Carlos went in the fridge and pulled out 2 beers and handed one to James. A couple of girls walked in and grabbed drinks too. Carlos smiled at them hoping to break the ice. Instead of trying to locate a bottle opener, Carlos let his confidence take over and took it upon himself to do his favorite party trick. He lined up the bottle top with the edge of the counter and smacked it down hard with fist. Without warning the bottle flew out of his hands. Carlos bent down to try and save the bottle but it fell to the floor with an explosion of glass and suds. Suddenly a moan came from in front of him. Carlos looked up to see one of the girls soaked from head toe in alcohol. James burst out in laughter as Carlos stood wide eyed at the drenched girl in front of him.

"I am SO sorry. That was NOT supposed to happen." Carlos was reaching for every napkin and paper towel to help dry off the girl.

"It's really okay." The girl said taking the paper towels and wiping her shirt. "I've fucked up enough tonight; this was just the icing on the cake." She looked up from her drink stained shirt to look at Carlos. She bit her lip and tried to smile. The sparkle in her dark brown eyes froze Carlos on the spot. She had to have been one of the most beautiful girls he had seen in a long time. Even with the beer dripping down her hair, Carlos knew this girl was something else.

She looked at him hard. "You're Carlos aren't you?" she said almost laughing. "You look just like your sister and clearly you're just as accident prone."

Carlos was red with embarrassment. 10 minutes in and the prettiest girl at the party already knew him by reputation. Carlos tried to explain but was too tongue-tied to attempt to speak.

Just then, Vanessa came running into the room, only to join in on the laughter at the mess in the kitchen.

"Well I guess there is no need for introductions, but Jas, this is my brother, Carlos. Carlos this is Jasmine." Carlos put his hand out to shake hers only to realize his right hand was covered in blood.

"You have got to be kidding me!" Carlos said. From the corner of his eye he saw James, still laughing turn and walk out of the room. Some friend, Carlos thought to himself.

"You know us Garcia's, we've gotta make a party memorable." Vanessa said grabbing Carlos's other hand and dragging him into the bathroom.

* * *

><p>James had already finished one beer and managed to start another before earthquake Carlos hit the kitchen. He took another huge gulp as he left the kitchen and found himself in the middle of a dance floor. As he made his way through the crowd, he watched as Vanessa pulled Carlos in the opposite direction toward the bathroom. Carlos was holding a wad of paper towels and seemed to still be apologizing as he walked.<p>

"Only Carlos." James thought.

He leaned against the wall and nursed his beer. The party had gotten crowded quick and there were groups of people at every inch of the room. With all the groups of people around, James felt like he should have been having better time. He looked at his watched and sighed realizing it was too early to make an excuse to leave. He considered going up to a group of girls dancing in the corner and introducing himself. One girl looked over and smiled. James smiled back and waved hoping that would be enough open up a conversation. James ran his fingers through his hair and prepared to give his best "come hither" look at her. Just as he did, a guy, much bigger than he, pushed past him and grabbed the girl to kissed her.

"Really? Ouch." James said out loud to himself. He never thought in the million years he'd be on the losers side of the "not you, the guy behind you" wave. Not being able to save face, James took another long sip and walked out of the room. He walked around the house hoping for a quiet place to sit until Carlos came out of the bathroom. He somehow found himself in what looked like a small office. He sat down and let out a long gush of air. He wished Carlos would hurry up. He didn't like hanging around a party alone. When Carlos had pitched the idea of going to a college party, James had envisioned walking into the room like running on stage for a show. Girls upon girls would catch his eye and he would pick the prettiest one to spend his evening with. So far, he had gotten a dirty look for the girl Carlos spilled beer all over and a smile and wave from another girl only to find out she was waving to the guy behind him. He was striking out all over the place tonight.

James stood up and felt dizzy. "Probably shouldn't have downed a shot and 2 beers in 10 minutes James." He thought to himself. He sat back down and closed his eyes. "Get it together. You're James Diamond. James Diamond doesn't just hide in a room during a party. James Diamond gets up walks over to the prettiest girl at the party and strikes up a conversation. What is your problem?" The problem was, the only girl James wanted to strike up a conversation with, wasn't there. She was miles away in Los Angeles while he was here drinking his night down the drain. Alone.

Without thinking he pulled out his phone and scrolled through the phonebook. He told himself months ago to delete her number but couldn't bring himself to do it. They were still friends after all. Friends can have each other in their phonebooks. Friends can text each other while on vacation.

_Hey_. _I am at the craziest party right now. There are so many beautiful girls. _Delete. _Hey. Could you ask Bitters to check our room? I think we left the stove on._ Delete. Delete. Delete. James wrote and rewrote messages but couldn't muster up the courage to say what he really felt. Finally he typed. _Hey. I miss you. I wish you were here. _He stared at the message.

"Just hit send. What's the big deal? She's your friend, James. You can miss your friends. Just hit send." He said to himself. His finger lingered on the button. James felt like pressing it would somehow send a bomb off somewhere in the world. "Well won't it?" He thought to himself. If he sent the text and got nothing back it would kill him. If he sent the text and got something back, it's would kill Logan. James squeezed his eyes shut, hit send and drained his bottle.

* * *

><p>"So do you want Barbie or Dora the Explorer?" Vanessa said showing Carlos the two Band-Aids left in their first-aid kit.<p>

"Oh no. Don't make me pick. Girly pink Band-Aid or girly pink Band-Aid? How can I ever choose?" Carlos said sarcastically. "Just pick one and put it on. I'm humiliated enough as it is."

"Ah wait Carlos! Not so fast. I think you're in luck. I have one more." She laughed pulling out a different one. "This one's perfect!" She pulled apart the Band-Aid and placed it over Carlos's cut. He looked down and immediately scowled at his sister who began to laugh even harder. "Look Carlos, it's princess Jasmine!"

Carlos pushed his sister as her laughs became louder. "Not funny."

"Oh come on Carlos. When did you get so serious? Jas doesn't care, trust me. She's cool. Besides, what does it matter?"

"It doesn't matter. I just made a complete ass out of myself in front of your cute friend. It's no big deal. Let's just get out of here." Carlos got up and walked out of the bathroom. The minute he opened the door she was there. His eyed widened with shock.

"Just wanted to make sure you wouldn't need any stitches." Jasmine's eyes sparkled as she smiled at him. Carlos blushed.

"I'll be okay. I'm a big boy." Carlos laughed.

"I can tell. Looks like Vanessa even gave you a big boy Band-Aid. Who'd you get? Ariel?" Vanessa took his hand to get a closer look. "Princess Jasmine. You're a man after my own heart. She's my favorite you know."

"I guess I picked the best one then." Carlos joked. He could feel Vanessa rolling her eyes as she walked passed him.

"Can I get you another drink? I promise I won't spill it on you this time." Carlos asked hopeful.

"I think I'm all good with drinks right now." Jasmine answered laughing. Carlos, deflated, began to walk away. Jasmine, who was still holding onto his hand, pulled him back. "How would you feel about a dance instead? I bet you're a better dancer than bartender." She winked at him and pulled him toward the dance floor.

* * *

><p>James looked down at the phone. No new messages. It had been 15 minutes. It was too early for her to be asleep. He looked down again. No new messages. He felt the bomb go off in his chest.<p>

What had he expected? Camille wasn't going to text him back. What for? To say she missed him to? Not likely. Who was he to her compared to genius like Logan? In a rage James stopped, stood up and looked at himself in the mirror. What was he saying to himself? Who was HE compared to Logan?

"You are James Diamond." He said to himself. "You are James Diamond! You are the FIRE. You are one-fourth of Big Time Rush. SUPER GROUP. You can get any girl at this party. You don't need Camille. You DON'T need her." With new found confidence, James threw the phone and walked out.

When James reached the party again he saw Carlos dancing close with the girl from the kitchen. "Wow. Only Carlos could spill beer all over someone and still score." He thought to himself. James walked over to the bar took a shot and with a new rush began his mission.


	5. The Morning After

"So you really locked yourself in the bathroom thinking that you'd be safe?"

"It sounds stupid now, but it made sense at the time. I had pillows and a fridge and a hot pot. It was actually pretty awesome."

"You had a hot pot and didn't think that would have been dangerous locked in a bathroom?"

"I was panicked!"

"Well I'm glad it all turned out alright."

"It didn't. Death came for me. I'm actually a ghost!"

Carlos raised his arms and made spooky ghost sounds. Jasmine fell back laughing. Carlos fell back next to her. For a moment they laid together laughing. With mix of drinks and dancing, Carlos and Jasmine had somehow made their way onto the porch of his sister's house. They had spent the entire night talking and laughing and getting to know each other. As the sun began to rise, Carlos felt like he had spent the night with an old friend.

Jasmine turned and looked at him. "I should really get some sleep. I have work in… 2 hours!" She said rushing to get up.

"Yeah, I should probably go find James." Carlos said following after her. As they stood up Carlos couldn't help but feel slightly helpless. He didn't know what to say. It had been such a long time since he had really met someone like Jasmine. He met lots of girls the Palm Woods that were cool, but it never went anywhere. He never felt like the girls he had met ever really got him. He had only known her for one night but he felt like this had been his whole life. He couldn't let her walk away so quickly.

"So…" Jasmine started.

"So…" Carlos repeated. He leaned in taking advantage of the silence.

"Carlos." Jasmine stopped him. "It was really great to meet you. I had a great time."

"Me too. You're probably the nicest girl I've ever spilled beer on."

Jasmine laughed once more and kissed Carlos on the cheek. "I'll see you around Carlos."

Before Carlos could react to the abrupt dismissal, she was gone. He felt like he had somehow found himself in his own fairy tale about a magical night with a beautiful girl who leaves too soon. Carlos pulled out his phone and dialed James' number. The phone went to straight to voicemail. Of course this wasn't going to be easy.

Carlos walked back into the house to see the aftermath of his sister's party. People who had spent the night were starting to get up and go home. Plastic cups and beer bottles were strewn across the floor and the music was still playing softly in the background. Carlos wandered around the house until he found James lying on an air mattress in the computer room.

"James. Get up. It's time to go!" Carlos whispered. He shook James.

Slowly, James woke up, but he wasn't the only one. From under the covers of James air mattress came another face. Carlos stood back slightly startled.

"Hey man." Carlos stood silent, staring from James to the girl, then back to James. "This is Natalie. Natalie, this is Carlos." James said cordially. Carlos looked at him dumbfounded.

Natalie waved.

"I better go, but I had a great night." James said leaning over to kiss the girl.

Carlos stumbled back, "Uh, right. I'm going to go say goodbye to my sister. I'll meet you at the front."

Carlos found his sister in the kitchen starting to make breakfast for the left over party guests.

"When you throw a party, you throw a party."

"What coffee, pancakes, and eggs? It's a hangover cure hangover cure-all. Should I make you some? You look exhausted."

"I'm alright, haven't slept yet, although I just woke up James and some girl named Natalie? I don't even want to know what that was about. He might need some breakfast, but none for me, I'm still a too high from the night I had - with Jasmine."

"Oh Carlos, Jasmine, really?"

"What? She's gorgeous and funny and smart. You know she's works 3 jobs just so she can help her parents with college and her brothers and sisters. She wants to travel to all through Europe and she plays the bass. She's incredible, Ness."

"Oh, trust me, I know. This makes me wonder what she was doing spending the party with you."

"Oh shut up. But seriously where did she come from? How come you never mentioned her before?"

"I've known Jas forever, but she's a serious girl Carlos, not like the girls you meet in LA."

"I know, and that's why I like her. But when I tried to make a move—"

Vanessa laughter took over her entire body shaking into her hands causing her to spill pancake batter all over the floor.

"It's not funny Vanessa, I really like her and she wouldn't let me kiss her and help me! Isn't this what sisters are for?"

"What, to help you with a booty call? No thanks, bro, and I can tell you right now, she's not that kind of girl."

"What are you trying to say Vanessa? I'm that kind of guy. I'm being serious! I really like her. I want to see her again."

"I'll see what I can do, but in the mean time before you go, clean up this mess."

"Will you give me her number?"

"Carlos!"

"Ugh, fine. Some sister you are."

* * *

><p>"Um, what the hell was that?" Carlos demanded as he and James pulled out of Vanessa's driveway.<p>

"What?" James asked smirking.

"Oh, I dunno, let's start with the GIRL I saw crawl out of your bed?" Carlos said.

"Oh, Natalie? Cute right? Great dancer." James said matter-of-factly.

Carlos slammed on the breaks. "What is going on with you, dude? You've been moping around the Palm Woods for months and now all of a sudden you're mackin' it to some random chick at a party? TELL ME WHAT'S GOING ON."

James sat in silence. He had hoped none of the guys had noticed his misery since things had gone down with Camille, but Carlos was much more observant than he let on.

Last night was still a blur to James. If it hadn't been for the look on Carlos's face, he probably would have forgotten the girl was even next to him. James didn't have to work hard to get Natalie to notice him. Walking onto the dance floor with his new found confidence reminded James of his life BC, Before Camille. Soon Natalie and her friends had surrounded James.

"It's nothing, Carlos. I was just having a good time, letting off some steam." James closed his eyes and saw visions of the night. He seemed to have been convincing not only Carlos but himself that he had had a good time. He remembered how good Natalie moved when they danced together. He remembered how sweet her lips tasted when she kissed him and how soft her skin felt on his, but had he enjoyed it? He couldn't remember. He seemed to have just been going through the motions. The only thing he could remember was how hard he tried to get Camille's face out of his head.

"James, it's me! You don't have to lie. Just tell me what's up. I'm worried about you."

"I'm in love with Camille."

For a second Carlos sat there mouth open as if he was trying to think of a comeback. James didn't dare move. He felt like he'd just let the pin out of a grenade and was just waiting for the explosion.

Carlos took a deep breath and slowly turned to James.

"Dude, you told me that chick's name was Natalie."

James and Carlos fell out in laughter. It wasn't exactly the reaction he was expecting when telling his friend that he was in love with his other friend's girlfriend. Fortunately, James was lucky to have a friend like Carlos to make such a heavy situation a little lighter.

James spent the next half hour try to explain to Carlos his feelings about Camille. Like a great friend, Carlos sat and listened and didn't say much. James felt as if a giant weight had been lifted off of his chest.

"So, she never texted you back?" Carlos said after James finished with a long sigh.

"Nope. Nothing. Was I stupid to do it?"

Carlos pondered the questions for a second. "Well, I mean, you guys are friends."

"THAT'S WHAT I SAID!" James screamed clapping his hands together.

"But…"

"No buts."

"But," Carlos continued, "What were you hoping to happen when you sent it?"

James looked at Carlos confused.

"What I mean is, what were you going to do if she did text you back? Start talking to her in secret? Tell her to break it off with Logan?"

Carlos had made points that James never really wanted to consider. What would he have even done if she texted him back? He knew the honorable thing to do would be to tell Logan the truth. That he was in love with Camille and that's would be that. On the other hand, what would happen to his relationship with Logan after that?

"Well, she didn't text me back. So it really doesn't matter what I would have done. Does it?" James asked.

Once again there was complete silence. Though James had more questions in his head before, he was happy to have been able to talk to Carlos.

"So," James started, breaking the silence, "Jasmine?"

* * *

><p>By the time Carlos dropped off James and got back to his house, he could barely keep his eyes open. He'd been up for almost 24 hours and there was so much on his mind he could barely keep it all straight.<p>

He fell onto his bed, clothes still on and closed his eyes allowing the sleep to take over him. The only problem was, with everything that had gone on in the past 24 hours, it was hard for his brain to relax enough for him to sleep.

First, there was the James situation. He had been right in guessing that there was something wrong with James, but he had never guessed it would have been as dramatic as him being in love with their best friend's girlfriend.

At first when James told him, Carlos couldn't help but feel slightly skeptical. James had a tendency of being slightly girl crazed but there was something about the way he talked about Camille that seemed different to Carlos. Even the way he always smirked a little when he said her name. This was bigger than a crush. He wished he had better advice for James, but he knew that there was no way this would end amicably for anyone.

Then there was the Jasmine. Carlos played and replayed the night in his head. When he got to the end he played it back in slow motion. The rising sun, the two of them face to face…

"I'll see you around Carlos."

Carlos turned in his bed. Where had he gone wrong? He had kind of assumed that after the accident in the kitchen, if she was still talking to him hours later, he must have done something right. Then he was completely denied a goodbye kiss. She hadn't even given him her number. Carlos supposed he could weasle it out of Vanessa, but didn't understand why after the night that they had why he would have to resort to begging his sister.

He wondered if he'd imagined it. It had been a very, very long time since Carlos had been in a relationship. Maybe flirting had changed since the last time he' d tried anything with a girl. Maybe he had built up this idea of the night in his head while she was trying to find any way out of there. Carlos replayed the night again.

He remembered the look Jasmine gave him when he asked her to dance. The way she took charge didn't seem like the attitude of a girl who wanted to get away from him. Carlos replayed that scene in his head again. As the party raged on, Carlos had gained the confidence to pull Jasmine close to him as they danced. He wondered if she could feel how hard his heart was beating as they began to move. She was by far the hottest girl he'd ever seen and the mere fact that he had this girl in his arms got his blood pumping. If she had notice, she didn't show it, but instead she held her eyes on his occasionally biting her lips and blushing. That had to mean something. Wasn't she the one that suggested they go sit outside where it was quiet? Girls don't just say that to guys they aren't interested in. No, it was real, he thought. It was all real. He closed his eyes and let his fantasies take over.


	6. The Park

"James! James Diamond you better get your butt down here, right now."

James awoke to sound of his mother screaming from downstairs. He opened his eyes to see that it was still dark out. He looked at the alarm clock. 5:00 am. He moaned and turned over.

He heard footsteps coming up the stairs and toward his room.

"James. Don't play dead. You promised you would help me with the fundraiser today." Mrs. Diamond said as she flicked on the lights. James rolled over putting the pillow on top of his face to block the light.

"That'll teach you not to stay up late at parties, young man."

"Mom, I love you, but seriously, you didn't mention it was during the ungodly hours of the morning."

"Oops! Now get up. You are going to be helping Ms. McCarthy sell shirts this afternoon, but I need you to unload the boxes from the back of my car… now. So get up!"

James rolled out of bed and quickly looked at his phone. No new messages. He groaned and got dressed hoping at least being busy would take his mind off of Camille.

"_James, JAMES! Cut it out! James Diamond, you better open your eyes right now or I'm leaving!"_

_Camille squealed as James eyes shot up, arms wrapping around and pulling her down on his bed._

"_I knew you were faking." She said nuzzling herself beside James. She kissed his neck as he pulled her closer to him. _

"_You've taught me well."_

"_Clearly I have, but you actually need to get up. We need to go. Now."_

"_How about we just stay here." James rolled over pretending to fall asleep on top of her. Camille giggled trying to push him off._

"_I'd love to, but what are you going to do if Mrs. Knight comes home? Or Katie? You know they're going to be home any minute and you and I are supposed to be at an audition."_

"_First off," he said between placing kisses up her neck. "You know there's no audition, right?" He smirked before working his way up to her ear. "Besides, they won't be home for another half hour, and we never get to hang out here."_

"_You know why we can't, James."_

"_You know things would be easier if we just…"_

"_James. Let's not have this conversation again."_

_James sat up looking down on Camille. _

"_Camille, there's no conversation for me. You know how I feel. I want to be with you. I'm ready."_

"_James, you know it's not that easy. Logan –"_

"_Shh, don't. It's simple. Do you want to be with me Camille?"_

"_Yes, but—"_

"_No buts. You want to be with me, I want to be with you. That's all there is." He leaned in and kissed her before she could protest. Within seconds her arms were wrapped around him in a passionate kiss._

When James opened his eyes again, the sun was almost fully up as his mother pulled into the parking lot of the park grounds. Mrs. Diamond was always the head of the local charity walk in Shakopee and James had been helping her for years before he left for LA. Now, that James was back, his mother jumped at the opportunity to have her son help out.

"So you'll be manning the t-shirt booth. Now, it's very important that you pay attention, those shirts sell like hotcakes so the table is busy. You don't have time to sit around playing on your phone the entire time."

"Don't worry mom."

"And you need to be friendly, none of this mopey stuff. You hear me? I want to see that James Diamond charm we all know you have in you."

"Of course mom. I'll have those t-shirts selling in no time."

"That's my boy."

As they walked through the park, Mrs. Diamond still rattling off directions to James, he took in the fresh air and bright sun of the day. He really did enjoy being at home with his family despite the Camille drama. He watched people helping one another unpack things for the walk and the smiles on everyone's faces. On days like these, he really missed living in Minnesota.

"…and don't forget to hand out my card to people that pass by. Oh, there's Mrs. McCarthy! Suzanne!"

James walked toward the woman whose round cheery face James remembered from years and years of pinched cheeks and smooches.

"Brooke – and James! My goodness, how you've grown!" Mrs. McCarthy said giving James a huge hug. "If only you weren't Brooke's son!" she said giggling to herself. James laughed politely.

"Well you're in luck today James, I've brought someone to help you man the table this year! Come here Alison, come meet James and Mrs. Diamond.

Out from underneath the table came a tall brunette wearing a shirt that matched Mrs. McCarthy's. The girl even had the same round cheeks and brown eyes.

"Brooke, James, this is my lovely – and single niece Alison."

James politely smiled back as he saw Mrs. McCarthy mentally planning his future with her niece. That was one thing he did not miss about being home. Charm and good looks, not to mention being the son of cosmetics mogul, Brooke Diamond, always gave mothers a reason to want to set him up with their single daughters and nieces…and granddaughters.

Alison put out her hand to shake his. "Hey."

"Well James, while you've been away, Ali here has been manning the fort so I think together you guys can handle it. Have fuuuun!" Mrs. McCarthy sang as she winked at her niece and walked away with Mrs. Diamond.

As soon as their backs were turned, James went around the table and started to unpack boxes.

"You want some help?" Ali said peering over at him.

"I got it." James said flatly.

"Not a morning person, I see." She said sipping at her coffee.

James again said nothing. He wasn't here to make polite conversation. In fact he hadn't planned on having to talk to anyone for the duration of The Walk with the exception of "$20, please", "Thanks." and "Have a good day."

Alison stared at him waiting for a smile or any reaction from James."Wow! Alright. I get it. Silence is golden. I was just trying to make light so early in the morning. Clearly you are not in the mood."

"No, I'm not."

"Sorry."

James went back to unpacking, while Ali leaned against the table sipping her coffee. For a split second he felt bad about being rude to the girl. It's not like it was her fault he was here. It wasn't her fault he was touching his hip every two seconds because he thought he felt his phone buzzing. She was just some chick at a booth.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm just – I had a rough couple of nights, and being here early isn't helping."

"What happened? Ran out of product?" Alison asked smirking a little bit.

At first James wanted to scream, but then put his hand on his head realizing in a daze he hadn't even looked in the mirror before getting in the car with his mom. He cringed with embarrassment. This was so not him.

"Very funny." James said combing his fingers through his hair.

"Well," Alison started resting her feet on top of the table, "Tell me about it. We're going to be here for next couple hours, I'd at least like some juicy gossip to get me through."

"It's nothing."

"Oh please, I'm not even gonna pretend like I don't know who you are. You're James Diamond of Big Time Rush, the great big stars of this little town. I've seen enough magazine covers and music videos to know that the "James Diamond charm" is all the way off. So what's the deal?"

"You know not everything you read in magazines are true…right?"

"Alright then pretty boy, give me the truth."

James hesitated for a second wondering why he would need to tell his girl troubles to a perfect stranger. But then he realized that was exactly the reason to tell her. She didn't know Camille from the next girl, well if she didn't consult the teen magazines.

"Pretend I'm your shrink. All you Hollywood types have them don't you?"

"I don't, but I'm seriously considering it."

"Well, spill. I won't judge. Well…unless you killed someone."

"No it's nothing like that. It's just - there's this girl…"

"Ah, it always starts with a girl." Ali said smiling to herself.

Before he knew it he had told the whole story of him and Camille from top to bottom. It seemed that once he got started he couldn't stop.

"So, that's… that."

"Well you are in quite a predicament."

"I'd say so."

"Well, I gotta say, I agree with Carlos, nothing good can come of this."

"So WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO!?" James said slamming his hands on the table. Suddenly everyone around them stopped and stared.

"Whoa. Chill there buddy. You're gonna cause a scene."

"Sorry. It's just so frustrating."

"Yeah it is, but it's not so complicated."

"How do you figure?"

Ali set her cup down on the table. "Is being with Camille worth losing your best friend?"

James sat in silence. Even an outsider knew he had dug himself in a hole he couldn't climb out of.

"I'll take that silence as a 'no'. So that's it. Case closed."

James furrowed his brow at how bluntly Alison had responded, but he knew deep down it was what Carlos had been saying and what he had been telling himself all along.

"Ouch."

"Yeah, it's not pleasant but it's the truth. It's time to move on. Besides I'm sure there are plenty of girls that would help get your mind off that girl."

"Well I have met some people since being home." James felt his stomach turn just thinking about how much he had drank the night before and what may or may not have conspired from it.

"So there you go! You just need some time away and you'll be back to you in no time. I mean most people find you quite attractive. It won't be hard."

"Are you saying you don't find me attractive?" James asked with a sly grin.

"Well I won't deny the obvious, but you're not really my type."

"What, too pretty?" James began to pout.

"Not pretty enough, actually. I like em real pretty and with a nice rack."

James did a double take as he saw the smile appear on Alison's face. After a few seconds it registered.

"Aahh. Got it. I think your aunt will be slightly disappointed. I could see her naming our children."

"Oh Aunt Sue gets like that with everyone. She's still got plenty of nieces to pawn you off on. Trust me."

"No, I think I'm alright."

"Seriously, I'll let her know and she'll start listing them all. That'll really get your mind off your girl."

"Wow, looks like somebody finally woke up." Ms. Diamond said as she walked over to James and Alison's table. After dumping all his Camille woes on Alison, James felt more at ease and more like himself. He joked and played with Alison like he was with an old friend.

"Your son is a riot, Ms. Diamond. He just needed a little caffeine."

"Well it's good to see him up and smiling again."

"Yeah, yeah. Can we go now?"

"Uh oh….the diva is back!" Ms. Diamond laughed nudging Alison.

"I'm going to ignore that comment."

"Of course you are. Well Alison, it was wonderful to meet you. Make sure you and James exchange numbers so you can come visit the house before he goes back to LA."

James could have sworn he had seen his mother wink and at Alison. He wanted to tell her she was barking up the wrong tree, but didn't feel like crushing her dreams so soon.

"Sure thing." James said giving his phone to Alison to put in her number.

"You can call me if you want, no pressure. I'm the shrink, remember? So call if you need an appointment and good luck with your…uh situation."

"Thanks. It was – really nice to talking to you Alison."

"You too, pretty boy."


End file.
